I can’t even type “I am not my accomplishments” without cringing a little bit. But clearly from my past blog posts I have an issue. An issue with raising the bar higher and higher for myself and for comparing my success to others. It’s gotten out of control. This is going to sound ridiculous but hilarious at the same time. Sometimes I even find myself comparing my life to Drake‘s or Nina Dobrev‘s (Vampire Diaries). Okay before you laugh hysterically, I only do so because A) They’re from Toronto and B) I know people who know them so in my head they’re tangible people and not merely celebrities if that makes any sense. And trust me I do realize how insane it sounds. I’m comparing myself to a highly successful international rapper and an actress from a hit television show. I’m laughing as I write this, it’s so far fetched. I come back down to reality because A) I don’t want to be a rapper or actress and B) they are rare individuals themselves, well at least their success is. If I was in their fields I could see why I’d be thinking – hey why aren’t I at their level? Thank God for the fact that I’m neither of those things or God knows how badly my depression/anxiety would be.
My point with this post is that I need to see myself beyond my accomplishments or I fear I’ll never be happy. Even with great success I still might be miserable. And what about the other facets of life? Family and friends and just being an overall good person? Do these things not count for something?
There’s a line from the movie “Across the Universe” where the main character says, “Surely it’s not what you do but how you do it.” And I’ve always remembered that. Maybe it’s time I apply that to my own life.