How I got a Insta-boyfriend, Scammed and then Faded On Part 1

*I have many draft posts I never got around to publishing, this is quite old. April 2017. Still a funny read though. 

I don’t know how I didn’t see this coming. I can usually spot a sketchy guy from far away. I’m out of practice. I fell in love (8 years ago). The game’s changed. Men are different. Hook up apps have changed the game.

He was doing everything I wanted, unlike all the other, as my friend calls it, fuckboys, I had dealt with. The things he was saying to me, about me. The things he was telling his friends and family. I was finally being seen as the catch I thought I was!

After about a month (maybe less) of dating, he insisted I travel with him to Ottawa to attend his close cousin’s 30th birthday. Now being a sensible woman, I hesitated. Were we really ready for a weekend trip away together? With all his romantic speak, I was soon convinced it “felt right” and we should go ahead. Long story short, his credit card was rejected at the hotel and low and behold I had to pay for us. I didn’t think much of it as he assured me he would transfer the money to me once he fixed whatever was happening with his card. I also assumed the hotel wouldn’t charge my card until the end of the trip and we would have solved his credit card issue by then. What happened next I blame on myself, it was naive and stupid quite frankly. I paid for a few of our meals as my “contribution” to the trip, thinking he would pay me back for the hotel.

Overall, the trip was entertaining and fun (except for one major issue, to be discussed in Part II). He was a fun and high energy guy, there was no denying that. When we returned from the trip he started a new job and soon began to pull away. Once I realized he was *fading (oppose to straight up ghosting) I started to ask for my money. I even sent him my email address for an e-transfer and told him it was okay if he didn’t want to date anymore but I would like my money back. He left my WhatsApp messages unread.

How did I not see this coming? There were a couple of odd situations. He would call and text excessively if I wasn’t answering within an hour. And really who goes that fast (other than people in love and there were no “I love yous”)? Sociopaths who take your money, that’s who.

My therapist asked if I was willing to get a lawyer and I can just see me in small claims court a la Judge Judy asking for my $240 back. How did my life turn into Judge Judy?

It wasn’t the money that was the issue. It was the principle. This was a grown 36 year old man. I found myself questioning things, does he even really owe me the money, since he paid for all those other dates? Was this him calling it even?

All I know is I have two weddings, two baby showers and a move coming up and I want my money.

Never again.

*By fading I mean he wasn’t treating me the same, wasn’t messaging frequently like he had previously, leaving messages unread for very long periods etc.

What are your worst/most humorous dating stories?

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